This Regret Page 6

  His jaw clenches as he turns his head away. “Every fucking day.” He turns back to face me, his eyes hard with hate and pain. “He made his choice though. He decided to leave us. If he cared, then he would be here.”

  “Yeah.” I swallow back the lump in my throat at the memory of that day. Just hours after the news of Adric’s death, we got a phone call from Dale, telling us they found Kellan’s car smashed up on the side of the road but there was no sign of him. We haven’t heard from him since and it’s been killing me every day. “You’re probably right.”

  “I am right,” he mutters.

  A few minutes later, Nathan is back in his Jeep and speeding off and away from the park.

  “What was that all about?” I ask as Jen walks back over and reaches for Jax.

  She rubs her hand over Jax’s head before kissing his cheek. “Oh it was nothing. Apparently, he made dinner and was wondering if I was going to come home to eat it before it gets cold. I must’ve left my cellphone in my Jeep.” She smiles at Kade and me before grabbing Jax’s diaper bag. “I’ll see you guys this weekend for the company picnic.”

  Kade gives Jax a high five and slaps Jen on the butt, causing her to jump. “Okay. He better have prepared something fucking great to interrupt our game of frisbee. I was kicking your ass.”

  Jen laughs. “You lost the frisbee, remember, genius? So really, I won.” She leans in so I can give both her and Jax a hug. “Bye, sweetie.”

  “Okay, bye,” I say unsure, getting a weird feeling in the pit of my stomach. “Enjoy your dinner.”

  As soon as Jen is out of sight, Kade grabs me by my ass and pulls my body against his. “I have somewhere I want to take you.” He kisses my neck, before bringing his lips up to meet mine.

  I let out a moan as he sucks my bottom lip in between his teeth and softly nibbles it. It doesn’t take long before I find my hands caressing his chest getting lost in him again.

  “Oh yeah?” I question while pushing my hands under his shirt and over his hard nipples. “Are you finally going to ask me out on a date?” I tease.

  He picks me up, with my chest pressed against his and sets me up against the tree. “Nope.” He trails kisses up my neck while running his hands over my inner thigh teasing me. “Even better than that. A tattoo shop.” His hand stops on my crotch, running his fingers over the thin fabric of my leggings, while biting my ear. “You’ve been wanting a tattoo for as long as I can remember. I found a cool little place about fifteen minutes out of town and I heard they do the best work.”

  Leaning my neck back, I reach out grabbing his erection that has been poking me for the last five minutes. “Does the idea of me getting a tattoo turn you on or something? I would be careful with that thing and where you point it.” I give it a little tap and giggle.

  He presses his forehead against mine while biting his bottom lip. “Mm . . . I love it when you grab me like that. Maybe next time we can be naked.”

  “Who said it’s that easy to get me in bed?” I reach up and unbutton the top of his black shirt. “I don’t just give my goods up to anyone. They have to be really special.” I place my hand on his and press it harder against me, rubbing it over my moist crotch, his fingers becoming desperate. “I think I will take that tattoo though.”

  I pull away, slap his chest and start heading for his truck.

  “Next time you do that, I’m going to fuck you where we are and you’re going to wish you gave in sooner.”

  He runs to catch up with me.

  I lean against his silver truck and brush my hair behind my ear. “Slow down there, buddy. I’m not so sure I like the idea of sleeping with my friend. This is only supposed to be a little bit of fun. Having sex gets complicated.”

  He leans over me with his hand on the side of his truck. “Maybe with time we won’t be friends.” He pulls the passenger door open and places his hand on my butt, giving me a boost inside. Then he closes the door and leans into the window. “I’m already starting to like you just a little bit more than before.”

  Surprisingly, so am I . . .

  Chapter Five

  Phoenix

  I can’t believe I just agreed to run off and get a tattoo. My leg is starting to bounce from the nerves that are flowing through my body and I can’t seem to stop fidgeting.

  Kade must be able to tell because I see a tiny smirk he’s been trying with little effort to hide.

  Yes, I’ve been wanting a tattoo since I was like . . . twelve, but I definitely wasn’t expecting today to be the day that I would finally break down and get it. I guess a part of me knows I’ve been kind of putting it off because of Adric. The one thing in life Adric said he was going to do was open his own shop and give some badass tattoos. Even though I always laughed when he said it, I always believed it was true and he would always be the one giving me my first tattoo. Sadly, I was wrong.

  After Kade has finally had enough of my crazy leg, his hand reaches over and grips my thigh, stopping it from its nervous bounce. “Somebody seems nervous.” He runs his fingers up my thigh before lightly running his fingertips over my crotch, causing me to squirm. “Or should I say excited?”

  I pick his hand up with a scowl on my face before setting it down on his own lap. “You’re making me nervous, dammit.” I press my head against the back of the seat trying my hardest not to laugh. “But excited? Not so much.”

  I look over and the stunned look on his face says, that’s something he’s never heard from a girls lips before.

  He places his hand over his heart with a small smirk on his face. “Ouch. That hurts a little.”

  He pulls the truck up to the tattoo shop, parks and kills the engine. He unbuckles his seatbelt and leans over to unbuckle mine. “You may say you’re not excited, but from the feel of something else, I would say you are.” His warm breath tickles my neck as he brushes his lips over my ear. “You can’t argue the fact that I make you wet.” My face flushes and I clench in all the right places.

  Wow, I’ve known Kade since he was a little boy and he has always been persistent when he really wants something. Now grown, he hasn’t changed much and is still a pain in the ass.

  “Kade, stop messing with me.” I can’t help but laugh as I push him away because the look on his face is priceless when he realizes I’m getting serious. “You’re becoming a pain in the ass. Didn’t anyone teach you to keep your hands to yourself?” A slow smile spreads across my face. “Dirt ball.” He quirks his head to the side and spins his keys around his pointer finger.

  “Oh, I definitely can be a pain in the ass, a big one, and you of all people know I’ve never been able to keep my hands to myself.”

  “Did you really just say that?” I question, still focusing on the first thing that came out of his filthy mouth.

  He shrugs his shoulders. “What?” he asks. “I didn’t say I wanted to be. I just said that I could.”

  “Sure,” I say trying not to smile, but it’s impossible to stay mad at Kade. “Well keep it to yourself because that, my friend, will never be happening. Especially after seeing that thing.” I give the crotch of his jeans a tap and he looks up with a proud smile.

  Before he can respond, I push the door open and jump out of the truck, my feet landing heavily on the cement.

  I glance up, my eyes pausing on the sign that’s hanging on the front of the brick building. It reads: Adi’s Attic.

  “Adi’s Attic.” The name rolls off my tongue with an intensity that lights a fire in my chest. Pain and excitement flow through my body, making it hard to know whether I should laugh or cry.

  Adi was my brother’s nickname as a child and I haven’t heard or spoken that name since the day he died. The nickname started when he met his best friend and partner in crime, Kellan Haze.

  Kellan looked at him and said ‘Adi, my man, I just saved your ass’ and it stuck. From that day forward, he was known as Adi Winters and the two became inseparable.

  My parents hated the name and Kellan as well, but that
didn’t stop him from coming over every single day. Those were the best days of my life. Those boys took care of me, protected me. They were everything to me, my best friends.

  Ugh! They’re not supposed to be gone, but here, with me. We were a team. I would give anything to have them both back. Every part of me misses them and a big piece of me is missing without them.

  Waiting for Kade, I nervously rub my hands over the front of my tank top to wipe the sweat off, my eyes never moving from the sign.

  I hear the slamming of the truck door before hearing his familiar grunt. “Shit. Not good timing.”

  I pull my eyes away and turn behind me to see Kade running toward me, holding his phone out in front of him. “I hate to have to do this shit, but do you mind if I make a quick run and come right back? I promise, it won’t take long.”

  I take a deep breath while watching him type on his phone. I am nervous as hell, but I’ve been wanting this for years and what better place to get it done than a shop with a name that reminds me of him. I guess it’s the next best thing since he can’t be the one to actually give it to me.

  “I’ll be fine, Kade.” I assure him. “I’ll just take a look around and try to find the design I want. No big deal, really. Go, run along,” I tease.

  He furrows his brow, looking up from his phone. “Are you sure? You’re not going to make me pay for this later are you?” he questions with a sly grin. “You’re not gonna want to start without me, though.” He winks. “Trust me.”

  I laugh as he takes a step back. “Why is that because you think I need you? We’re not kids anymore, I don’t need the big bad Kade around to hold my hand and laugh at me. I’m a big girl, I think I can handle it on my own.” I smile and place my hands on my hips, trying to convince myself and it almost works.

  He looks from my lips to my eyes biting his bottom lip, before pointing at his face. He says, “When that needle starts digging into that smooth, sexy flesh of yours, you’ll need a distraction. That beautiful, is why I’m here, not to hold your damn hand; although, I’d gladly hold something else.” He slowly skims down my body, a low growl rumbles through his chest. “Sorry, but gotta run but I’ll be back, ten minutes tops.”

  Rolling my eyes, I place my hand on his chest and give him a little shove to get going. “You’re right about one thing, you are a huge distraction. I’m not saying that’s a good thing either. If you’re referring to your dick that you’d be holding, then be my guest,” I tease. “Have to run, there’s a tattoo I should be picking out.”

  Before I can turn to walk away, he grabs my wrist and pulls me to him. “I’ll make sure it’s a good thing.” He grins and starts walking backwards until finally he jumps in the truck and drives away, leaving me alone.

  Too bad he couldn’t have tripped. That cocky son of a bitch.

  Exhaling, I turn around and my eyes land on a guy leaning against the wall of the brick building. He has brown shoulder length hair, tattoos everywhere, including his neck and a lip ring that curls around his bottom lip. Despite the warm weather, he’s also wearing a beanie. He has this sexy, bad boy look about him. Actually, I can see Jen jumping all over him, if she wasn’t with that prick Nathan.

  He pulls his foot up against the building he’s leaning on, takes a cigarette from his pocket and places it between his lips before lighting it. Taking a puff from his cigarette, he pushes his hair out of his face and leans his head back catching sight of me. “Are you here for a tattoo?” I nod and he continues. “Do you have an appointment?” He shoves a hand in his pocket, waiting for my response.

  I shake my head and give him a nervous smile, just now realizing I didn’t even bother to think of that before showing up. Maybe I won’t be getting that tattoo after all.

  “No I don’t, I’m sorry. Do I need one?” My eyes scan the street curb for any parked cars. When I see it’s empty, I turn back around to face him with a smile. “I can make one and come back at a later time if you’re too busy.” I pause as he laughs. “What’s so funny? I’ve never gotten a tattoo before. I really didn’t even bother to think about an appointment.”

  His eyes shoot up to meet mine before he takes another drag. He looks amused by my answer. “No shit, you’re a first timer? Damn, my boy will love you then. He’ll love popping your cherry.” My cheeks turn red and he takes notice. Looking me over, he reaches for the door and holds it open with a smirk on his face. “Go ahead sweetie and take a look around. He’ll find you in a few.”

  “Okay, thanks . . . I think.” I step into the tattoo shop, my eyes widening with curiosity as I take in my surroundings. The name fits the place perfectly because to my surprise it resembles an actual attic.

  The place is small. The front must be their version of a lobby, housing a glass display with a register and a small desk to the side. I assume that’s for sketching. To the right of the door sit four plastic chairs and a table piled high with tattoo magazines. To the left is a bathroom door covered in graffiti. In the back sits, a tattoo station on each side and all four walls seem to be covered with tattoo designs.

  I walk over to one of the walls, my eyes searching through the pictures. Some of them are real photos while others are just sketches and drawings. So far, I like what I see and can tell why Kade has heard they have such a good reputation.

  “Welcome to Adi’s Attic,” a deep voice comes from behind me. “Can I help you find something?”

  Without glancing back, I run my hand along the pictures on the wall in search of something beautiful and feminine. If I’m going through with this tattoo then it has to be perfect. I won’t accept anything less. Adric took tattooing seriously, to him it was an art and he probably would’ve kicked my butt if I didn’t as well.

  “Um . . . I’m looking for something, I just don’t know what yet. Something . . .” I stop to turn around and my breath catches, “Beautiful,” I manage to whisper the last word and release a small moan. I didn’t mean to but it just came out that way.

  When my eyes meet his, my heart starts pounding and I can’t pull away, hell I can’t even speak. He’s got to be the sexiest man I have ever laid eyes on. He has thick dark hair, beautiful amber eyes lined with thick black lashes and a pouty bottom lip that I want to suck into my mouth. As my eyes continue downward, he has an athletic build that says he obviously works out. He’s wearing a black V-neck shirt showing tattoo covered arms and jeans that sit low on his hips.

  I lick my lips unconsciously and look back up to meet his eyes. I suddenly feel a sadness looking back at them. Those light amber eyes look so broken and pained. They’re dark and beautiful, staring at me with an intensity that makes my knees go weak and my body want to surrender to his every command.

  If a sexy distraction is what I need, then it looks like Kade doesn’t need to worry. This guy has it covered just fine. Something he definitely won’t be too thrilled about since he always has to be the male attention in any room.

  The guy’s forehead scrunches up as he studies me with a look that feels strangely familiar, but new all at the same time. It almost looks as if he has something he wants to say, but doesn’t. Instead, he nods his head and then turns to face the other direction. “Something beautiful shouldn’t be too hard for you to find.”

  He walks away, his black boots making an intense, angry thud against the hardwood flooring.

  My eyes slowly trail up the legs of his faded jeans, landing on his nice ass before finally moving up to his snug shirt, revealing his sculpted back. Maybe being left alone isn’t such a bad thing after all.

  I watch as he leans over the glass display, pressing both of his hands against the glass. He stays like that for a moment, not making a sound, and possibly not even breathing, before finally he reaches behind it and pulls out a binder. He just stares at it, not making a sound, as if he’s not sure he wants to show it to me.

  I clear my throat breaking the awkward silence. Maybe he’s got other things going on, because he definitely doesn’t give off that ‘I’d be happy t
o tattoo you’ vibe. “If you don’t have time to fit me in today then I can just come back. I’m in no hurry.” He squeezes the bridge of his nose and clenches his jaw, probably not even realizing how deeply I am watching him. “I’ll just come back-“

  “It’s not a problem,” he cuts in. His voice comes out sounding as if me being here is causing him physical pain. That same pain as the look in his eyes and somehow I wonder if today just isn’t a good day for him. Personal issues maybe? A fight with his girlfriend or maybe the loss of someone close to him. Whatever it is has him hurting bad.

  I should just leave and assume today just isn’t the day for a tattoo. “I’m not even sure what I want anyways. My friend kind of talked me into coming today. I’ll just come back.”

  “Stay. I said it’s not a problem and I meant it.” He walks over so he’s standing right in front of me. His eyes land on mine for a second time and I find myself trying to figure out where I’ve seen that look before. Those eyes are so familiar yet I can’t place them.

  Before I can finish my search, he pulls his eyes away and pushes the binder into my arms. “You’ll find the form to fill out in the back folder. Go ahead and look through the tattoos, get your I.D out and fill out the paperwork. I’ll be back in a few.”

  Running a hand through his disheveled hair, he turns around and shoves the glass door open, leaving me alone in the shop.

  “Now I wish Kade was here,” I mumble, feeling a bit down all of a sudden, just unable to get past this guy’s attitude.

  I take a seat in one of the chairs and set my purse down next to me. “This so better be worth it.” I dig through the mess in my purse, finding my wallet at the very bottom, hidden under makeup, papers, candy and pretty much anything else you can find. It never fails to be this way, but yet, I refuse to clean this damn thing out.

  After filling out the form and setting my I.D on top, I open the binder and start looking through the tattoos. I’m surprised to see that every single tattoo in the binder has something to do with beautiful peacock feathers of some sort. There are so many different sketches of them with beautiful colors and designs. It’s like this binder was made specifically for me and I can’t help to feel a bit emotional as I look though them.